Rating of sample essay

• Curiosity and Passion for Learning: 7/9 ✅ Shows a genuine interest in scientific research ✅ Shows an understanding of the scientific method ✅ Persistence in finding a research opportunity ❌ Lacks depth on intellectual contributions ❌ Limited discussion of broader interests

• Depth and Commitment: 8/9 ✅ Strong commitment to research evident ✅ Continued research despite obligations ✅ Engaged with specialized equipment ❌ Lack insight into long-term commitments

• Personal Presentation: 6/9 ✅ Portrays persistence and enthusiasm ✅ Shows willingness to engage with community ❌ Lacks deeper self-reflection ❌ Writing competent but not engaging

Suggestions

• Adding more personal reflection ✅ How your perspective changed ✅ Challenges faced and how you overcame them ✅ Personal qualities discovered or developed

• Highlighting intellectual contributions ✅ Questions asked, problems solved, insights gained

• Connecting to broader interests ✅ How the experience relates to long-term aspirations ✅ Other science or disciplines you are interested in

• Showing more personality ✅ Details about interactions with other students ✅ Experiences on campus